crease crease
as it took shape
she embodied it- what it stood for- what it meant
to her, to the future, to the past
finished
placed on the mantle with care
but she didn't realize
it had heard her
those hopes
those wishes
those dreams
and as it took flight
it flew for her
The imagery is lovely and adds a nice narrative-y voice to it. The personification of the paper crane is a nice representation of the girl. I also enjoy the sparse punctuation, because where necessary it gives it pause, and where it is not needed a good flow.
ReplyDeleteI like the fact that the ending is rather abrupt and mysterious, it leaves a residual effect on the reader. I may suggest to add another stanza to further your imagery.
ReplyDelete